I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy