so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Randomize