Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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