You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
