I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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