He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
