Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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