chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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