it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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