Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
