I think I just saw someone hide a body.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook's as public as her vagina
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize