I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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