thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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