I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
