then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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