Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
this boner is exhausting
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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