We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
