just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize