Why are handjobs necessary in class?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize