Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
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