Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
