we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
