so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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