Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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