dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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