I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
