I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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