i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
