Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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