just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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