ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
