I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Too much gin, very little bucket
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
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