i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
