your thong is hanging out like whoa
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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