There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
