what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
