do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize