You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
