Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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