Screwed.edu
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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