im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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