I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
