so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
