I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
