I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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