Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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