Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize