i was born a porn star she said
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
