i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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