i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
even my farts smell like vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
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